September 8th, 2009

hgmh

Come on Karley, you've lived two lives before


Well, my weekend in Warren was fine. Although the wedding was my main excuse to come home, the real reason for going back is Adam, my wonderful boyfriend who I am officially in a long distance relationship with. *cringes* I was a complete wreck yesterday, even before I got to see him. I feel like this is so much harder on me than it is on him and even though he's said that he's gonna miss me just as much or whatever I'm still so afraid it's going to be too hard to handle. And yeah, it's only eleven days till I get to see him next, but that's how it's going to be for the next eight months. Two days on, two weeks off. How is one supposed to fall in love with someone they rarely get to see?

So, this week is for classes. French starts in an hour actually so this won't be too much longer. It's also hopefully a week for making friends. I may be a networker but I am awful at first impressions, or so I think. But hanging out with Kirsten and Matt Way and Katie last night was fun. Especially Matt Way, who I think is extremely cute. Not that that matters obviously.

I miss Adam :( Knowing that I won't be able to see him whenever I want just kills me. I'm not worried about him finding another girl or any of that. I'm worried about how this year is going to go and how much strain this is going to put on us. I'm worried about him and how he's going to be this year, if things will get better or worse. I don't know if I'm prepared for what is coming at me but I don't really have a choice anymore do I?

hgmh

A crying log


cry: v. to weep; shed tears, with or without sound.

I think I am going to start keeping a crying log to document when and why I cry (since I do it so rarely). I don't even know how I got this idea or why I want to do it so bad but I do. And today, I will post my first entry.

September 7, 2009: Leaving my most marvelous boyfriend for Western Michigan University. And not only was it that, but the whole day was bad, starting with Adam being a dummy and not coming over until after 3, only to leave at 4:40 on my last day in Warren for eleven whole days. But that wasn't just it either; it was the walk I took before he got to my house where I thought about all of the things that could go wrong in my relationship due to the fact that I chose Western over Oakland before I had met the guy who would make me rethink that. It was nerves and fear and unpreparedness. But most of all, it was the fact that while I want to fall in love with Adam, who I am completely crazy about, I am reluctant to do so because of distance.



«N'oublie jamais tu auras toujours mon coeur» <3
  • Current Music
    Sick Again // Led Zeppelin
hgmh

You Picked Me // A Fine Frenzy


Like an apple on a tree
Hiding out behind the leaves
I was difficult to reach
But you picked me
Like a shell upon a beach
Just another pretty piece
I was difficult to see
But you picked me
Yeah you picked me
<3
  • Current Music
    I Need This More Than You Know // Dear Juliet